good,bad,ugly

I'll admit that I am very nervous about every blog I write now. Oh well.

In watching the girls I have learned something that I think I can apply to my whole life. The girls very much like to get into things and to do things they may or may not know is wrong or right. I feel like all day I am saying "no Ella dont do that" or "Evie no throwing food" ect.
(picture stolen from Emily Brotherton)

I have also noticed that I hardly ever say "good job" or "thats awesome"

(lunch at applebees)

I noticed in my own life a lot lately ( and this isnt a bad thing) that I have had a few people be like "um katy why dont you think about it this way'" or "that was not the best way of thinking" ect.

I know for myself I tend to start walking a little bit more carefully and start to over analyze everything I do...but very rarely I ever hear after everything "hey you did a really good job" or "your acting better" ect.

(stolen from Ryan Brotherton facebook)

The bottom line to this blog is for me to improve the way I respond to the girls. To not always keep telling them "no" but to applause the good they do everyday also. Its hard sometimes
cause we being human beings always tend to look to the negative side and not the positive side.

Jesus would you help me to look for the "good" little things in life everyday. To help me understand and see people through your eyes!

quiet

Im a quiet person, most of you who know me are most likely laughing at that statement. I love to just sit and watch and take in the everything that is around me all the time! I think thats why I love to travel so much, is because I get a chance to sit in an airport and watch people live apart of their lives in fount of me!

Ella and I

Evie and I

two precious little girls I get to spend everyday with! Im pretty sure Ella was saying "no" when I took the picture! Gotta love them!
Random post I know!

no man land

Its hard sometimes to express how I feel without it coming out wrong or offending other people. Thats not my goal in writing a blog. Its not my goal to call everyone stupid and to make everyone think I am "right" and you should do everything my way. I know for sure I am far from prefect and need A LOT of work myself, and like I said in my last blog its a matter of crying out to Jesus and asking him to take these broken pieces and place them back together.

I made a blog one cause my fingers can almost type as fast as my brain is thinking and its just easier sometimes to type it out then write it out. Two because I will be traveling a lot this summer and thought it would be a good way to keep people updated on what I am doing in my life.
This is not a cry for help, or a please listen to me and only me. This is not a build me up to make myself feel better...This is only a place for people to understand that I dont have it all together. I mess up everyday trying to find Jesus and trying to live for him.
So, please just enjoy the journey along side of me! I would love to have you come for the ride!

yes, no, maybe

I have about three different blog post running through my mind right now, so if you want to stay with me through my ramble, you are more then welcome!

I'll start with the latest thought, it came to be last night at our youth groups worship service called "the presence" its just a night filled with worship and that's basically it! Well last night theme was Fill in the: ______
At the end of the night they asked everyone to grab a piece a paper and write what God told them that night. Me being me made the excuse that I had to go get the twins out of the nursery so I couldn't get a piece of paper and pray with two other people.... the truth is, I really had to get the twins! :)

Anyways, as I was worshiping I noticed that I could "feel" God in the room but at the same time I couldn't "feel" God in me. One of the strangest things I think I have experienced in my life. Then I felt like he was talking to me, but we all have those moments of "no that was just me" you know??
Well I felt like he was saying that "I would have to fight for this". As that was runing through my head for the most of the service, I wasn't sure what he was trying to say by that, "I have to fight for this." Then they started to sing "You wont Relent" by Jesus Culture. I have never liked this song, for some reason I had judge it before I had even heard it all the way through, and its repeats a lot and I don't like that!

Go here to watch it I cant find out a way to upload it yet:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74JgXohEcco

Basically the song is about not to stop living until Jesus as all of us. But the part that got to me the most was the: "Come be the fire inside of me, come be the flame upon my heart, Come be the fire inside of me, until You and I are one."

How I long for the fire of Jesus to come in and take over my heart, until him and I are one! I guess I cant stop fighting.

The next thing I felt like he said to me was...."you are going to have victory" now victory is something that I have always felt like God was going to give me. Its also something I never wanted to fight for. Now putting these two words together, I need to start fighting for Jesus. I need to start pushing things that get in my way of Jesus out and fight to spend time with him and fight to reach for him and fight to feel him in my life....until the the day I stand before him!

Lastly, its a choice. I have to choose if I am going to get up and fight or not.

prayers

so I had a funny thing happen to me...one of those "okay God I get it...you are funny"





the other day I was at working, working with a co-worker I normal dont work with. Lets just say that her and I are different in the way we go about things and sometimes butt heads. So that day I lift a small pray up to heaven

saying "dear jesus please dont let me have to work with her anymore'


needless to say I went to look at when I work next week and her and I are closing together one night...I looked up and said "okay God I get it...your funny!"


I guess he is teaching me a lesson in how to work along side people we may or may not want to work with! or he is teaching me he answers prayers a little bit differently then we might think!

Its a process, always be a learner!

ncis

some may say I am addicted to NCIS (a tv show) and you know I might be only because I am two disc away from watching all of season three that I got on Monday night. In my defence the tv in my room doesnt have cable.
I have been thinking, you could learn a lot about 'family' while watching this show. The team of investigators are more like a family in an odd kindof way. They are not scared to stand next to each other while one tries to disarmed a bomb, knowing fully that they could die also. Or cover for one another when they have to bust into a house that may have a killer inside. When in these highstressed situation they dont bail, they stay.

I dont know maybe if the world was a little bit more likely to treat people like family, and not just the kindof family that stays around until we get into something sticky. But the kindof family that sticks together in those times when we are in the sticky. I think the world could be a better place in the end.
Just some a thoughts I have been thinking about lately.
We are suppose to be community right? Well would community not communicate with each other? Would community really lift you up when your down? Does community really look past the past mistakes we made? Does community really believe and help grow us?
What is community to you?